What makes a great negotiator and an average negotiator? Is it strictly about strategies, or is it about a person’s level of emotional intelligence? Negotiating is a skill that is learned and perfected through practice. It’s not about being a skilled “shark.” It’s about being able to negotiate effectively and coming to a beneficial agreement when closing a deal.
Negotiating is ultimately about getting something that you want. Both parties are trying to get something that they want and usually want to come to a mutual agreement. The only way for both parties to get what they want is by first understanding the other person’s perspective. Most people see negotiation as winning or losing, but negotiations are actually about creating value. Having the skills to negotiate effectively is very important to ensure that you can create value when settling a deal.
Managing emotions is very important when implementing negotiation strategies. Because emotions play such a huge role in personalities, they can also affect our negotiations. In recent years, emotional intelligence has gained a lot of attention and traction, especially within business and leadership. Although it is not typically taught in school, it is developed with diligent practice.
Being able to negotiate effectively is often associated with having high emotional intelligence. This ability allows you to understand the other person’s perspective better and make an informed decision that can even benefit both parties. According to an article by Joshua Vemuri, MBA, only 25% of people are able to reach their goals when it comes to negotiating. And this number can be increased to at least 75% with emotional intelligence.
Many different academics have created various models of emotional intelligence over the years. Some of these include those by John Mayer and Peter Salovey. The Salovey and Mayer model describes four different types of emotional intelligence.
The first two types of emotional intelligence are “perceiving emotions” and “using emotions.” “Perceiving emotions” is having the ability to perceive emotions accurately from others and oneself. “Using Emotions” moves into having the ability to consciously access and produce emotions that will facilitate a thought or opinion. The third is “understanding emotions.” This is the ability to interpret emotions and provide the necessary information to make informed decisions. The last type of emotional intelligence is called “managing emotions.” This is the ability to regulate and enhance one’s emotions. Mayer and Salovey also included two identifiers within this category known as “emotional self-awareness” and “emotional management.”
Emotional intelligence is primarily about self-control and self-awareness. It’s essential for people who can and want to negotiate effectively. Having high emotional intelligence can help someone make an informed decision and avoid getting too stressed out in high-stakes situations. Consider developing your emotional intelligence as your progress in your negotiation skills.